Peters thoughts about Venom

Peter's thoughts about Venom

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This is a Spiderman x Venom
mentions of drug abuse
anorexia and stuff like that

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There are a lot of things I would do for him
After everything he has been through I feel like its the least I can do for him.

Even if it is as small as running my fingers through his dyed hair while his body is shaking from the nightmares of his haunting past.
I sometimes think to myself if he hadn't dyed his hair, it would still be that pretty golden color.

I remember him from school, he had changed so much, back in those days he had been so shy, pulling on his sleeves and tugging his beanie over his face when he got embarrassed.

When I saw him again that day, we didn't know we were each others enemies.
All I knew is what I saw, he was aggressive, wild, a rebel without anyone to hold his leash and to keep him within the line.
He got into fights left and right, for the sheer amusement of it. Bruises would litter his body after each day when we would meet up to hang out.
I remember asking him to calm down on it, that I was worried he would break himself one day.
At first he didn't listen, then I guess he thought about it, because I kept on asking and then in the end he listened.
I like to think it was because he heard the worry in my voice but I guess he just didn't want me to continue nagging him about it.

I remember when I found out he was taking drugs, messing with his own head, destroying himself from the inside.
I felt like my blood froze inside me.
I had noticed he seemed to be a little lost sometimes but it never looked to bad, knowing he was doing this to himself to escape memories of the past hurt me.
I wanted to help him.
I tried to get him to stop, he wouldn't listen to me.
His eyebrows furrowed with annoyance every time I brought it up making the light reflect on his eyebrow piercing for a short amount of time.

He didn't listen to me but I saw he was more calm with it.
I hoped that he knew I cared about him and still care.

I remember talking to him during the times we hung out, we stayed outside most times.
One time I asked him what he liked the most in the world.

He answered that he found the stars beautiful and he would love it if he could see them, then he looked up into the sky and made a comment about how light pollution was ruining his nights that could be spent gazing at the stars.
That was the time I first noticed that knowledge that was hiding behind his drug clouded eyes.
He was ruining a perfectly good brain and amazing knowledge.

It hurt to know that.

I remember the day we found out each others identities, we were outside, it was starting to darken outside and it was a bit chilly.
He had been bored and I had been staring at him, just admiring his face, he didn't even notice me staring at him.
He stuck his tongue out and used it to touch his nose, it was longer then the average tongue and could give the lead singer of kiss a run for his money.
He was fiddling with his piercing when I called him out on it, I had seen that tongue before in my life.
Venom's tongue was so very similar to it and he stared at me for a while.
He then asked if I was Spiderman, I said yes, it answered my own question to him being Venom, but I thought that Venom would be so much different, I didn't know he could take the form of a normal human.
I asked him about that and he gave me a sly grin in amusement, it made me get a fluttery feeling in my stomach.
He explained that Venom was like a parasite that lived of him, he was the host of Venom, but he had chosen to take a name with similar meaning for the sheer irony of the situation.
I laughed at it.
We stayed friends.

I never called him Venom when outside together but when we were in our suites close to the public, that is when I called him it, when I knew we were alone our not in our suites I would call him by his chosen name, Poison.
I didn't realize until much later, much much later that he had gone to the same school as me.
That is when I remembered his other name, Lucas.
The sweet shy kid that could barely speak to others.

It was a bit of a shock, remembering that kid and then looking at how he had turned out.

After I found out his identity being Venom it brought a thought to mind, Venom was a cannibal.
With that in thought I attempted to get him to eat fruit.
In time I got him to try it, turns out then that he started to eat less well… human and more fruit.
Later on he told me that he found green apples the best.
I found it suited him in a way, both of them were sour…
Well…he's not totally like a green apple but he can be really stubborn and bitter about things.

One of the days that we hung out I asked about his past, before Venom, he said he didn't remember anything from then.
He said the reason he picked a name for himself was because he didn't remember his original name.
I felt like someone had squeezed my heart, to not remember anything had to be horrible.
Now I know it was more mercy than cruelty…

I remember how he had told me Harry and MJ were together, I didn't believe him, I thought they would tell me as soon as they would.
When I found out they he had told the truth I felt foolish…
I had cried, feeling betrayed and in my clouded mind I sent him a text.
He came over…
After letting me calm slightly down he told me how clinging to hope of being with MJ had clouded my mind and thoughts from seeing the attraction they held for each other.
When he said that I saw a spark of knowledge in his eyes.
He gave a slight huff and then told me not to say stupid stuff like that.
I laughed, it was just so Poison like to say something like that.
I felt better around him.

I remember poking his ribs and stomach often, he looked uncomfortable about it, I thought because he knew how skinny he was, about how his skin seemed to cling over his bones.
How breakable he looked once you thought about it.
I remember wondering how he was able to pin me down or fight me.
Must be because of Venom…

I remember how we first kissed, an accident…
We had been so frantic, and then we crashed into each other, next thing I know I'm on top of him and he's under me, all skinny yet so beautiful and our lips pressed together.
I felt his chest rise up and down as he breathed, and his taste, his smell…
I scrambled off him as I remembered, we were friends, nothing more, just friends…
I said I was sorry and attempted to help him sit up.
He told me to watch where I was going with a growl.

After that moment, the air felt much heavier.

I grew a bit more awkward when I was around him, I couldn't get him out of my mind, everything about him.
But he was just a friend…

He looked slightly sadder but I never asked him about it.
Then one day he just cut all connections.
I looked for him, it was after a few weeks later I found him.
I remember the feeling that took over my body when I found him.
It was like all the blood in my body froze and my heart clenched.
He was unconscious and had been binging on his drugs and he clearly had not eaten in a while.
I felt so scared for him.
I remember picking him up to take him to the hospital, he had felt so light, way to light.

I stayed with him until he woke up, which was a few days later.
When he woke up he freaked out, it took a while to calm him down but when I did I told him how worried I had been.
How I found him unconscious and undernourished.
I think he didn't mean saying it but he said he still felt fat.
Cold fear latched onto me.
If he felt he was fat then that scowling he had done when I poked his ribs and stomach must have made him think he was well…fat.
I told him how skinny he truly was, but one look into his eyes told me he didn't believe me at all.

After that I went to the library to try to find out how to help people who had anorexia, I also looked on the internet, anything to try to help.

When I came back to him I told him he had to stand up in front of the mirror, he didn't seem happy about it.
I then removed his top so he could see his ribs and stomach.
I took his hands and put them over his stomach, made him feel how skinny he was, made his fingers press down to feel his ribs poking from his skin.
When he realized, he cried.
I held him as he cried, he mumbled something, I couldn't hear what it was but I tried to help him.

I tried to get him of the drugs, tried to get him to eat.
Slowly of course to make him get used to it.

My feelings for him grew every day.

I remember asking him to be in a relationship with me.
I remember the slight fluster that got onto his face.
I remember him looking me in the eyes and saying yes.
I remember my cheeks hurting from smiling.

Sure he can be mean sometimes, other times downright cruel.
But he is mine.
He's a tease, he doesn't like it when he's surrounded by people and deep under all that mean and cruelty is still that sweet little shy kid from the past.
He's cuddly in his sleep and then when he wakes up he pushes me out of the bed because he feels embarrassed for cuddling up to me.  
I feel lucky to have him.
Even with the few bruises and bite marks I sometimes get from him.
I love how he then takes it upon himself to nurse me until I feel better, nuzzling into me and licking the bite marks with care.
Much like a cat mother
It was cute.

I must end this here, my experiments won't finish themselves.
Wouldn't that be a world, where they finish themselves.
Oh well

- Peter Parker.